Sometimes I think that, as people, we are so used to taking on responsibility we’ve forgotten who is actually responsible. Our beautiful hearts have good intentions. After all, we are compassionate and caring. Somehow, in the midst of it, we’ve added pressure and stress to our lives that doesn’t belong to us. Added to this is the realization that by taking on other people’s responsibility we prevent them from being empowered or encountering God.
I understand because I go there regularly with the best of intentions. I’m not so convinced it is worth the pressure or stress.
Who’s responsibility is it? God’s or mine?
This question pops up frequently in my mind. A lot is going on in my life. Finances are tight, Sean’s company is rebuilding and Sean is on his spiritual journey. Aaargggg. Enough now. To top it off, my freelance work is slow.
In some ways, I demand a breakthrough, the fulfillment of God’s promises, and my prayers answered. I want to scream at God so he can hear me – I am that frustrated at times.
The hardest part is that I can’t do much more than what I am already doing. Of course, I apply for jobs we feel I will be good at and (truthfully, I want to stay a freelance writer; I love it) what my freelance work brings in a good month is way more than what I’d get from a full-time job minus the extra expenses (unless its an amazing job opportunity).
So, I find myself in the position of prayer and waiting. My role is to remain loving, supportive, and kind to my boys and hubby. I do what I can to keep stress down at home. Still, I want to do more. There has to be more, right?
The Holy Spirit gently whispers “Is this your responsibility or mine?”
What is my responsibility?
My responsibility is to love my husband and children; to make my home peaceful and clean. I need to keep my family healthy by cooking good healthy wholesome food. I am also responsible for my own happiness, relationship with God, and writing success.
What is God’s responsibility?
Only God can open up business opportunities and change hearts. It’s God’s responsibility to provide and protect my marriage and family. Yes, I do my best to seize opportunities as they arise. Still, only God can give us grace and favor. He alone can open doors for us. His Holy Spirit is responsible to soften hearts, bring change and restoration.
Getting my priorities right
The world, today, is comprised of instant gratification, fear and urgency. It must get done now, or else…..This message is broadcasted into the spiritual atmosphere around us.
Distractions quickly rise. Before I know it, I find myself in a disappointing place. I make idols out of social media, work, escape, etc. I forget my first love as I take on responsibilities and burdens, I was never meant to solve. In the pressure that comes with this, I become an volcano of negative emotions spewing hot lava wherever I walk. My family relationships take strain. No, its not worth this.
“Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.” Psalm 37:4
“seek first his kingdom and his righteousness and all these things shall be added to you. Matthew 6:33
So, I stop and I breath. This is my responsibility – to thoroughly enjoy God, the life he has given me, and the season I am in. I do all that my hands find to do to the glory of the Lord. I let him do the worrying so I can enjoy my boys , my marriage and my life.
Change is the only constant in life. Worrying about things I can’t fix is futile. I let go. Focusing on Jesus, I take myself off the hook, because the pressure is off. This bump is just a bump. God is with us, therefore, I have peace.
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